When living with a genetic disorder, life is very precious. We notice every little detail of our health, because it so drastically impacts the quality of life. Just seven years ago, I was able to move around in a somewhat normal fashion. Since then, my health has progressively deteriorated. Nowadays, I wonder which day will be my last.
Here I am, awake at 03:14, awake for the past couple of hours. I woke to spasms in my diaphragm, similar to hiccups, only they spasm multiple times in a row, or a constant spasm or cramp, that stops breathing. It is amazing, how fast a person wakes up from a sound sleep, when you cannot breathe! At the moment, I am waiting for the muscle relaxant to kick in. My diaphragm is still cramping, but only a few seconds at a time, so I just wait to breathe, trying desperately not to panic.
There has only been a couple times in my life where my chest and/or diaphragm has cramped for so long that I have collapsed. Fortunately, the cramp released in time for me to continue breathing, because I had no one to give me artificial respiration.
I really did not expect my health to get this bad again. It always happens when I cannot take care of myself. As others with A1AD, I also need a proper diet, lifestyle, and medication to manage the genetic disorder, and when I cannot live that way, that is when this happens. I realize I am being vaugue in my descriptions of what is happening with this genetic disorder. Perhaps, within the next few days, I will be more specific, so others may learn about the difficulty of living with this disorder.
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